788. Om jayat-senayai namah: I bow down to Amma who has an army which is only accustomed to victory
It's been a curious day. A day where I have wondered about Amma's love for me. Does She? Does She not? Is She even aware of my existence? Am I praying to a God? Can She even hear me? Are my prayers falling on deaf ears? Maybe it's time for me to re-look and re examine my faith. Maybe it's time to look for a God who makes me feel happy instead of one who puts me under the dark cloud I seem to be walking under. Maybe it is time to look for a God who loves me unconditionally. Maybe it's time to seek a God who puts me through situations only so that I can come out victorious rather than throw me into situations where I'm unable to find an explanation to my predicament. Maybe it is time to finally find a master with whom I can repose complete faith. Maybe it's that stage in my life where I need to find a more forgiving Guru. A Guru who will protect me fiercely and never allow anything bad to ever happen to me.
Maybe it's just time I understood Amma better.
Om Amriteswariye namah!
It's been a curious day. A day where I have wondered about Amma's love for me. Does She? Does She not? Is She even aware of my existence? Am I praying to a God? Can She even hear me? Are my prayers falling on deaf ears? Maybe it's time for me to re-look and re examine my faith. Maybe it's time to look for a God who makes me feel happy instead of one who puts me under the dark cloud I seem to be walking under. Maybe it is time to look for a God who loves me unconditionally. Maybe it's time to seek a God who puts me through situations only so that I can come out victorious rather than throw me into situations where I'm unable to find an explanation to my predicament. Maybe it is time to finally find a master with whom I can repose complete faith. Maybe it's that stage in my life where I need to find a more forgiving Guru. A Guru who will protect me fiercely and never allow anything bad to ever happen to me.
Maybe it's just time I understood Amma better.
Om Amriteswariye namah!
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